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last reply by Bryce H.
2 months ago
Lucy D.
LONDON,
United Kingdom
436 posts
Member since: 08/04/2011
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Admit it, we've all checked out our ex's on Facebook. What were people's reactions when they did this? Was it a "thank goodness I dodged that bullet" moment or a "aww I wish we were still together moment"?
I ask because I just looked up my ex on facebook out of interest (we were together for 4 and a half years. It's only natural :-P ) and his profile picture was of him in some kind of Transformers outfit he'd made out of cardboard boxes while clearly bored at work. First thought was "Hmm nearly 30 and still acting like a child" and second thought was "well I guess he never followed through with his plan to leave his job he spent nearly 5 years complaining about, getting qualified for something a bit more well paid like he always said he would, and making something of himself like he said he really wanted to"
So definitely a dodged bullet feeling for me! Especially when I think if I'd stayed with him and continued to be frustrated with his constant complaining about how his career wasn't going anyway, but at the same time having a complete lack of ambition. Like everything was supposed to just be handed to him. And compared with my current boyfriend who's got huge amounts of ambition and really determined to make something of himself.
What about you?
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Chris F.
FORT WORTH, TEXAS,
United States
6792 posts
OG since: 06/21/2009
I'm actually still on good terms with most of my exes. I just met up with one for coffee the other day; my last one is way out in San Antonio, but we text a couple times a week. So naturally, I end up seeing their Facebooks a lot.
But my FIRST ex... we're not on bad terms. But she changed a lot since we dated. Let's just... let's just say she has some interesting decisions in hair styling, as of late.
posted Jan 30, 2012
Rach ..
LONDON,
United Kingdom
104 posts
Member since: 01/03/2012
Lol sounds like me. Since breaking up with my ex I got an undercut and at one point, dip dye.
My ex's facebook. hmmm. I tend not to venture there often if I am honest. He was basically a completely naff boyfriend who did FA for me. I could go on, but hey, took me two years to see the light.
As for what I think when I take a cheeky stalk... I think he is still a lazy prick whose new girlfriend aint got nothing on me(shallow I know. And it is completely subjective so don't hate haha). And then I remember how wonderful, gorgeous and not lazy my current boyfriend is.
Oh and theres no 'aww' feelings. Only 'I wish we never got back together after the first time we broke up'. :)
posted Jan 30, 2012
Rach ..
LONDON,
United Kingdom
104 posts
Member since: 01/03/2012
have you not heard the term 'facebook stalk' before or something?
posted Jan 30, 2012
Rach ..
LONDON,
United Kingdom
104 posts
Member since: 01/03/2012
what evidence do you exactly have to say I 'obviously do it too much'? :P
posted Jan 30, 2012
Maya C.
NEVADA,
United States
65 posts
Member since: 10/20/2011
I've done it, ninety-nine percent of the time I'm thinking "Oh God, I am so glad I got over this loser"
posted Jan 30, 2012
Carolyn M.
JOISEY,
United States
942 posts
OG since: 09/25/2009
I'm still friends with both my ex's, so I don't really facebook stalk them or think I really dodged a bullet or anything.
At the same time, I can't say I really have any "awww" moments when I look at their pictures, but that's probably because third time's a charm - I love who I'm with now more than anyone else. :]
posted Jan 30, 2012
Anna V.
MANCHESTER,
United Kingdom
1152 posts
OG since: 11/29/2009
I don't have an ex but sometimes I look at the profile of a guy I liked once and just to see what an absolute twat he is.. can't understand why I liked him once.
posted Jan 30, 2012
Lucy D.
LONDON,
United Kingdom
436 posts
Member since: 08/04/2011
"And then I remember how wonderful, gorgeous and not lazy my current boyfriend is. "
This! It's amazing to think back to the amount of time you spent with this one person thinking they were gods gift, then compare them to your current boyfriend and it's like "holy cow I was stuck with him while this amazing guy was out there somewhere!?!"
Julia, everybody looks up people they used to know on facebook. Whether it was friends from school or old flames. It's like some kind of morbid curiosity.
There are however some people who take it way too far. My friend for example is friends with her ex on facebook. They went out for about two months and broke up in October last year. They've actually now been broken up for longer than they were together and she still chews my ear off every time we get together about what he's been saying and "omg all these girls are posting on his wall and he's absolutely loving it!" which drives me completely insane, especially as it clearly upsets her but she refuses to un-add him *bangs head against brick wall*
But there's nothing wrong with having a little look every now and then. Especially when it fills you with that feeling of, yes it was really hard breaking up, but I'm glad I did :-)
posted Jan 31, 2012
Rach ..
LONDON,
United Kingdom
104 posts
Member since: 01/03/2012
Well said lucy :-)
posted Jan 31, 2012
Lucy D.
LONDON,
United Kingdom
436 posts
Member since: 08/04/2011
I didn't start this topic for people to be rude to one another. Please take your aggression elsewhere.
posted Jan 31, 2012
Zahira O.
JAKARTA,
Indonesia
420 posts
OG since: 01/30/2010
i try not to because i'm always the one who got dumped ._. it was painful. i'm cool with my first 3 exes, i still hang out with them sometimes. but the last two are the hardest. both were great relationships, but ended up in a really really bad way. I don't want anything with or related to them. because of 'i wish we were still together' feelings.
posted Jan 31, 2012
Therese Isabelle D.
ASKIM,
Norway
209 posts
Member since: 11/03/2011
Actually, i haven't. With my first ex i can't, cause he doesnt have facebook. No loss really. And I dumped the other one 4 years ago, and i still don't have any interest of what he's doing or not doing so havent seen him on face since the day i deleted him as a friend.
posted Jan 31, 2012
Tok V.
Germany
390 posts
Member since: 12/03/2011
I used to do that shortly after our break-up, and of course I was terribly furious when I saw he commented on girl posts or something :D But now I just don't care. He's got his own life, and I got mine. I'm okay with that because, actually, I feel that I have now found the love of my life. I had only one boyfriend before this one. :)
posted Jan 31, 2012
Christopher L.
GT,
Guatemala
1624 posts
OG since: 09/19/2009
Well my last ex sent regards with a mutual friend during the holidays so I just had to check the FB, I just had to........I'm so glad we're not together anymore. DD:
posted Jan 31, 2012
Lucy K.
Australia
97 posts
Member since: 02/26/2011
my ex has a new gf now. he is living and working in london.
copied me! made me angry because he always gave me a hard time for doing it and then he copied me. loser!
posted Feb 5, 2012
Samantha T.
SINGAPORE,
Singapore
534 posts
Member since: 08/28/2010
guilty. well i think back and go "wtf was i thinking?!" but after looking at his current progress in life im glad we're over.
posted Feb 5, 2012
Christina A.
TEXAS,
United States
614 posts
OG since: 06/06/2010
last time I checked out a boyfriend's page on facebook (I didn't even have a facebook and we were still together, long-distance) I found out that he had a new girlfriend. so. I would just suggest not doing it, it never makes you happy no matter how ugly his new girlfriend is.
posted Feb 5, 2012
Jen O. C.
VANCOUVER,
Canada
3620 posts
OG since: 02/18/2009
my last serious ex I deleted from everything because we didn't end on good terms really, but awhile ago I searched his name just to see how he was doing. His profile picture was of him and someone I presume to be his current girlfriend on Halloween. He was dressed as Aquaman and he'd gained a fair bit of weight, and evidently still lives in the same apartment we lived in together, which was a bit surreal for me. Seems like his career is going well, but when I think about how my life might be if I'd stayed with him, I feel an immense sense of relief.
My other exes and I are still friends, so I don't have to feel guilty about creeping on their facebook profiles.
posted Feb 5, 2012
MaryAlice M.
WONDERLAND,
United States
782 posts
Member since: 09/14/2011
I don't need to look up my ex on Facebook. He is my best friend. I talk to him every day. I probably know more about him and his whereabouts these days than I did when we dated. lol
posted Feb 6, 2012
Chelle G.
ORANGE COUNTY,
United States
151 posts
Member since: 01/18/2012
I don't, when I had recently ended things with him I would occasionally check him out but I figured what's the point? It's not healthy to obsess or invest your time in someone from your past.
posted Feb 6, 2012
Becky B.
2005,
United Kingdom
594 posts
Member since: 08/28/2010
I have both my exes on Facebook. My last ex's wife added me too which was odd. I accepted, even though I've never met her, because I didn't want to look like I was still pining over him. He seems very happy now with his wife and kids so I'm happy for him, even though he was a tool.
posted Feb 7, 2012
Reiel L.
JAPAN BUT LIVING IN MANILA,
Philippines
290 posts
Member since: 12/13/2011
i'm checking my ex's account. and he has a new girl now.
he even deleted our albums. just pictures with me. but his other ex's album, were still there on his account.
i guess, his happy and inlove so i'm trying to move on
posted Feb 19, 2012
Reiel L.
JAPAN BUT LIVING IN MANILA,
Philippines
290 posts
Member since: 12/13/2011
that's totally true. its just sad that we see them happy with their new love and we're not, cause we're investing our time on them.
posted Feb 19, 2012
Reiel L.
JAPAN BUT LIVING IN MANILA,
Philippines
290 posts
Member since: 12/13/2011
that's totally true. its just sad that we see them happy with their new love and we're not, cause we're investing our time on them.
posted Feb 19, 2012
Gabrielle D.
FLORIDA,
United States
75 posts
Member since: 07/28/2011
Oh goodness this is a funny topic because its hush hush, we all know everyone does it but its sad to admit.
I am friends with all my exes but they werent true lovers like my last boyfriend. I love them all so much but I dislike calling them my exes, they are just my friends, as for the last boyfriend.Oy vey!
I was engaged to him and yet he blocked and deleted me from FB, its almost been a year since he did it too which is crazy. I wonder if he ever tries to look at my profile on Fb though because I am friends with some of his friends and my profile is private, he can look through theirs to look at mine. In a way, I wish he would because Ive done tons of photoshoots, posted lots of awesome stuff and now I have something to brag about haha. I would love to have the satisfaction of him being jelly or him wanting me back. I would really love that.
posted Feb 24, 2012
Lucy D.
LONDON,
United Kingdom
436 posts
Member since: 08/04/2011
I wonder if my ex boyfriend looks up my profile on facebook aswell. Mine's set to friends of friends and we do have friends in common still so it's possible. I don't think he'd be surprised by the fact that I moved on and met someone new so quickly because it was me that said I was unhappy in the relationship and wanted to end things although for a long time he did suspect I was seeing one of my football friends based on the fact that they'd comment on my photos on facebook. so I know he was constantly looking at my facebook for the first couple of months at least.
posted Feb 24, 2012
Chelsea M.
NORTH CAROLINA,
United States
151 posts
OG since: 05/25/2009
I am friends with most of my ex's on facebook still so I randomly see things pop up about them. One in particular is just so unbelievable to me. He married a fellow marine and she is not very attractive and seems to be a complete psycho and his entire family hates her (the ADORED me!). Now they are already divorced. It's just so strange how things work out and how I know so much of the story because of facebook and I hardly directly speak with him.
He had joined the marines before he finished highschool, which is part of the reason we didn't last because all he could talk about was going to war and I couldn't handle that! He ended up getting severly injured (bleeding in the brain among other things) in a roadside bomb in Afghanistan and I always try to imagine what it would have been like if we had stayed together. Thankfully he has recovered but till so scary to think about!!!
posted Feb 24, 2012
Kristine M.
LOS ANGELES,
United States
16 posts
OG since: 12/03/2009
I have actually lurked my ex's FB recently, and safe to say that I am happy that I am no longer with him. I don't think I can be friends with any of my exes because it gets awkward or one of us always still have feelings. My most recent ex and I were on and off for three years and we tried to be friends, but that didn't work out. He actually told me that he has a gf now which he told me via Tumblr and he said that I helped him be with her. So I'm glad that he's happy.
posted Feb 25, 2012
Joy D.
GHOST WORLD,
United Kingdom
2693 posts
OG since: 01/11/2010
I still live with my most recent ex, so that would be redundant! I'm still friends with 2 of them, so I talk to them on Facebook from time to time, and the only one I'm not still friends with pops up on my newsfeed as we have a lot of mutual friends and so I occasionally have a quick nose to see what he's up to.
I used to like to see if he had a gf, smugly observe that I was prettier/thinner than them & laugh at his bad clothes but now I've grown out of that now! He might've been a jerk when we were together but I didn't exactly end things in the nicest way & I'm glad that someone else has made him happy.
posted Feb 25, 2012
N ..
Satellite Provider
123 posts
Member since: 02/14/2012
Oh yes, I did look him up and that was only two weeks after we broke up. worst thing I ever did, he had a new girlfriend. TWO WEEKS. WTF.
posted Feb 25, 2012
Katie L.
INDIANAPOLIS,
United States
346 posts
OG since: 08/30/2009
I'm still friends with 8/9 exes on Facebook. I tend to date guy friends, and we tend to have the same mutual friends, so it's hard to get away from each other. I'm naturally still friends with most of my exes because of that. But, I don't lurk their profiles because I don't like the feelings that accompany it. I'm 19, so I don't think I've ever had real closure to a relationship, or a real satisfying relationship yet. So, when I look at their profiles--though I'm in a wonderful relationship right now--I can't help but to feel bad about the break ups.
posted Feb 26, 2012
Hannah M.
ZZYZX RD.,
United Kingdom
293 posts
OG since: 01/25/2010
i'm on good terms with my exes.
but ... yeah i check in every now and again. having the means = natural curiosity.
posted Feb 27, 2012
Grace B.
COLLEGEVILLE, PENNSYLVANIA,
United States
23 posts
Member since: 11/10/2011
I used to stalk my ex, thankfully his new girlfriend was uglier than I was... so it was ok. But still kind of sucked
I'm naturally curious
posted Mar 5, 2012
MaryAlice M.
WONDERLAND,
United States
782 posts
Member since: 09/14/2011
Hah, I sorta Fb stalk my ex"lover's" ex girlfriend. hehe
posted Mar 12, 2012
Emily Jane P.
MELBOURNE,
Australia
38 posts
Member since: 02/09/2012
yeah i check every now and then, and i'm glad to say its a good thing i broke up with them after what i saw lol
posted Mar 12, 2012
Bryce H.
NORTH EAST,
United States
6 posts
Member since: 03/05/2012
I looked her up and was pleased to find out she is engaged to a strange guy who loves beer and has a big gut. lol
I feel pretty good about things
posted Mar 13, 2012